Sexuality: 7 Obstacles to a Fun and Fulfilling Lovemaking For Christian Married Couples

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Many Christian married couples have yet to experience a fulfilling sexuality. Yet, it is an essential ingredient for a vital Christian marriage. Here are 7 obstacles to a fun and fulfilling lovemaking for Christian married couples

1. Not knowing what God says about sex

The first commandment God gave, was to engage in sex (Genesis 1: 27-28.) God had just created humanity in His image, commanded them to be “fruitful and multiply”, and then commented “it was good” (Genesis 1:31.) Somehow, it seems like this was a priority for Adam and Eve.

2. Talking very little with your spouse about sexuality or your preferences.

When couples can share with their spouse about sexuality or their sexual preferences, intimacy is created. An emotional bond results from the intimate level of vulnerability on a conversational level. A great place to start talking about sex is to share what lovemaking means to you emotionally, how frequent you would like to have sex, and even times of the day or specific days.

3. Engaging out of obligation, rather than enjoyment

Many believe sex was solely intended for procreation, rather than recreation. To the contrary, the poetic references in the Song of Solomon describe lovemaking that is enjoyable and anticipated. Feel free to have some fun with sex with different positions and places. However, all must be with respect for your spouse’s considerations.        I Corinthians 1:4 states that our bodies belong to our mates, not just us. It is written from a spirit of equality, where both spouses are to serve one another, rather than one controlling the other. For one spouse to force the other into sexual behaviours without consent is abusive.

4. Failure to plan

Many couples, Christians especially, are sexually frustrated. While some of this may be attributed to different sexual appetites, much more is a result of infrequency. Sex is never convenient, but is critical to a vital relationship. Plan for sex like you would any other appointment. Rather than thinking of this as stale, consider that it allows you and your spouse time to plan for the special time together. Planning also alleviates any concerns for sexual deprivation and sexual pressure.

5. Using sex as a reward or punishment

Sex is often used as a reward for some positive behaviour. Or it can be withheld when one spouse is angry with the other. Couples sabotage themselves when their sex life becomes a bartering system. Because of its vulnerability, lovemaking must be unconditional to be meaningful. Find other ways to thank your spouse, and healthy ways to overcome your resentments.

6. Unresolved sexual abuse issues

Sexual abuse issues follow spouses into marriage. Victims of sexual abuse may have an aversion to lovemaking, or experience painful reminders of the past. For some, there may be a distortion of healthy sexuality. If you have been wounded from sexual abuse, realize that you did nothing to deserve this. Furthermore, there is hope. I encourage you to have faith in God for healing and recovery. It is one thing to survive sexual abuse, and another to overcome it. With God, ALL THINGS are possible. Looking at the past is will hinder your recovery and faith in God.

7.Pornography

The most significant destructive force to a healthy sex life is pornography. And yes, I am talking about Christian marriages. Images are burned into a person’s mind, thereby creating an insatiable thirst for more erotic behaviour, or harmful behaviours. Some couples have stated the use of pornography enhances their sex life. I disagree. Not only is it degrading, but it fosters empty relationships by focusing on the physical rather than love. If your marriage has been affected by pornography, go back to GOD (the author) to help you rebuild the intimacy in your marriage.

In my experience as a Life Couch, a lot of confusion exists amongst married couples regarding a healthy Christian sex life. The reality is that God has given sex as a gift for married couples to embrace rather than tolerate, or misuse. So much of today’s culture promotes a contaminated view of sex. As Christians, let’s change our culture by strengthening our marriages with a healthy Christian sexuality

Christian Love Making- The Importance of Getting It Right

Learning how to become a great Christian based lover carries much more depth than average individuals who have no strong attachment to faith based practice. There’s a lot of responsibility that goes into Christian love making for two main reasons.

 

  1. While your Christian love making is a very joyous, celebration based affair, at the same time it should be seen as very serious as opposed to just a casual encounter. The seriousness stems from the faith based practice of being a Christian; the level of commitment you have in your religious life and professional life, should also be translated into your private life of a lover. For this is your time of celebration, performed through the most intimate physical contact. Thus it should be paramount to learn the highest levels of how to practice the amazing gift of Christian love making which God has given us.
  2. You are not only celebrating God’s gift through intimacy, you are also celebrating the relationship with your partner. Thus this celebration should be practiced with high regard to being able to properly please you’re partner to the highest intimate, sensual degree as possible. This attention to sensual detail brings you’re intimacy in line to all other areas of a positive well lived Christian lifestyle.

Many times intimacy is seen as a secondary level of serious consideration, or even something that is not considered at all, when it comes to learning how to live a well rounded Christian lifestyle. As you see intimacy can not only enhance your Christian lifestyle, but also greatly enhance your relationship with your Christian partner in life.

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Henzyworld gets you motivated and inspired in your Relationship, Life and marriage. We focus on your inner worries also provide counselling services and everyday news.

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